Lonely...

It seems strange to be posting at 12:32am. Normally, I am sacked out with drool coming out of my mouth and the sounds of a freight train coming out of my nose!

Other Guy is out of town on business. It is his last night away but I just can't sleep. I miss him when he is gone. He has not had such a good trip this time. The airline lost his luggage...he is sick with a cold...he got a migraine and his meds were in the suitcase! Sadly, every time we speak, I can hear it in his voice that there is no place else he would rather be than home with his girls. While it pains me to hear that, it also brings me great joy. You see, we will be married 9 years this month and there is still no place on earth he would rather be than with me and that is just fine with me.

Peace Out!

With a Voice of Triumph!

This week has been an interesting one for me. During that blessed annual exam that we women have to endure each year, my doctor found a "thickening" in my left breast. We decided to order blood work and do a sonogram. Unfortunately, both of those events did not occur until last week.

Well, fast forward to Sunday morning. Our praise band did a new song by Hillsong entitled Salvation is Here. And no disrespect to Hillsong but my MAN, my brotha from another motha, Ms. Gina, Soakie, Jimmy Luv, Little G, Dr. John and Sam "I am a rockstar" totally blew it out of the water! Yes sir-re bob, that was me in the back of the worship center with my hands raised, tears streaming, "It's gonna be alright. Cause I know my God saved the day. And I know His word never fails. And I know my God made a way for me. Salvation is here!" Those were my friends, too, with hands raised high praising our Creator for his awesome answer to prayer. You see my sonogram was negative and that moved me in a big way.

Satan has a way of taking something that has the potential to be bad and blowing it out of proportion. He didn't want me to rely on God and trust him for his answer, regardless of what it might have been. Satan wanted to scare me with thoughts of breast cancer and memories of what my sister has gone through and continues to go through. But with the help of Other Guy, my family and my friends, I kept my eyes on the prize and stayed focused on the fact that God had this in the bag and would see me through, regardless. He only wanted me to trust him.

We ended the service this week with another Hillsong praise song and whether they realized it or not, our praise band answered God's call and played a song that enabled me to Shout unto to God with a voice of triumph, Shout unto God with a voice of praise.

Join with me this week, because regardless of what is going on in your life right now...The enemy has been defeated. And death couldn't hold You down. We're gonna lift our voice in victory, we're gonna make Your praises loud. Shout unto God with a voice of triumph! Shout unto God with a voice of praise! We lift Your name up...We lift Your name up!

And all God's children said....AMEN and AMEN!

Peace Out!

Fear...

Fear is a mysterious thing that is very hard to put into words. It has a way of sneaking up on you in moments that you think you are immune. It has a way of turning something and twisting it until you find yourself questioning all you know to be true. I must admit that today I am fearful. I am fearful of the unknown, the upcoming, the answers. I won't go into a lot of details but I will say that I need your prayers. I don't want to be afraid, to be fearful. I so desperately want to cling to the promises that God has given to me. I know that He is in control right now but I also know that sometimes His answer is no and although that is His will, it is frightening.

There is a song by Jeremy Camp entitled Longing Heart and it is beautiful. It begins by saying, "What can separate us from the love of Jesus Christ, nothing this world could even change. I thought I once was lost but now have been given grace. It is a mystery that I will not chase! Yes, it's a mystery that I will not chase. You, you, you are what this heart is longing for. Oh, Jesus you are all my soul is pleading for...well I don't understand it, how you love the way you do. Even when I've fallen you always lift me up to you."

Father, you are what I am longing for at this moment. I pray for your mercy and your grace. I plead for an open heart to accept whatever answers you have for me. Help me to crawl into your lap and feel your peace embrace me. Help me to trust in you and to not be afraid. Amen

While researching fear, I found this really cool website that has notes from a sermon on Fear. It's pretty cool and I look forward to reading all the verses.

Peace Out!

N-Uff!

We just started this new series at church and if I might take the liberty to say...Tim Howey ROCKS!!! I have pretty strong opinions on finances. I have lived the gamut of lifestyles from being flat out poor to doing pretty good. Now before I get any emails or smart comments, I am not, I repeat, am not in any way saying that Other Guy and I are rich. We have struggled with finances just like any other person on earth. We have made some really smart decisions (like our new budget for 2008) and some pretty dumb decisions (sorry no dirt on those!) I am convinced of one thing though, it all comes down to decisions. The ones I consult the Father with first always seem to work out one way or the other. The times when I (we) lean on our own understandings and abilities, well those generally land us flat on our face!

Although we live in one of the wealthiest counties in the US, I don't want my girls growing up never knowing what it's like to long for something. I don't want them to have everything handed to them on a silver platter.

When I was little, my mom was a single parent and I am sure she got tired of the constant complaints of "We never get this or that's not fair!" So, she went out and bought us all composition books. Every week she would bring her paycheck home and divide it equally among us but that also meant we divided up the light bill, the phone bill, the groceries, the gas...everything. We soon had a better grasp on why we couldn't afford certain things. It totally changed our outlook about whining when we didn't get something. We fully understood why we couldn't afford it. It gave all of us an appreciation for each other and that memory still sticks with me. Regardless of our financial circumstances, I want my girls to see their blessings for what they are, gifts from God.

There is a song by Toby Mac (& Kirk Franklin) that just hits home on this subject. It's entitled Lose My Soul. Here are some of the lyrics: Father God, I am clay in your hands. Help me to stay that way through all life's demands 'Cause they chip and they nag and they pull at me And every little thing I make up my mind to be

Like I'm gonna be a daddy whose in the mix. And I'm gonna be a husband who stays legit. And I pray that I'm an artist who rises above the road that is wide and filled with self love. Everything that I see draws me Though its only in You that I can truly see that its a feast for the eyes - a low blow to purpose And I'm a little kid at a three ring circus

I don't want to gain the whole world and lose my soul. I don't want to gain the whole world and lose my soul.

Man, I just love that! There are so many things in this world that call for my attention but I don't want to gain the whole world and lose my soul. I want to know that when the final curtain falls, I will stand before the one who created me and here six beautiful words. WELL DONE, GOOD AND FAITHFUL SERVANT!

Peace Out, Ya'll

New Blog Rule?





Have you ever heard the rule about never go grocery shopping when you're hungry? If you were to take that rule, write it down on paper, do some cool origami trick turning it into a cup and pour water into it, I honestly believe it would hold. Basically, I believe there is a lot of truth to this rule. Equally important, don't ever grocery shop with your kids...I guarantee you spend more money than when you do it without them. Somewhere between the cookie aisle and the cereal aisle, you lose all control and will be tempted to buy 10 bags of powdered sugar doughnuts just to keep them quiet (& possibly feed your stress=food addiction!)



Well, I think there should be blog rules too. For instance, every time something trying happens in my life, I am immediately tempted to blog about it. Right or wrong, it gets my opinion out there for the world to see. But blogs, as other things in life, can be very dangerous. There have been times when I have argued with a friend or my husband or a family member has made a comment or SUGGESTION that just completely rubbed me the wrong way. During those moments, I want to open my computer and type furiously about the offense in some cyber attempt at getting somebody to agree with me or at least hear me out without having to listen to their reasoning or opinions. Pretty selfish, right?



Thank goodness I serve a God who is powerful enough and caring enough to shut my big mouth because in all reality things that bother me one minute don't seem to big a few minutes later. God is AWESOME.

So, I guess in everything, moderation...moderation...moderation. So, all in favor of a new blog rule of never blogging while angry signify by raising your right hand or just right click...all opposed, same sign ;0)



Peace Out!

Seriously, did I miss something?

I can not believe that it is already 2008. Where did 2007 go? I feel as though I just woke up from some type of freaky dream and I some how lost a year of my life. My girls seem taller and older, my house seems different, I feel different. Am I alone here?

I was recently listening to a Carrie Underwood song and I just love the lyrics...there's some things that I regret, some words I wish had gone unsaid, some starts that had some bitter endings. Been some bad times I've been through, damage I could not undo, some things I wish I could do all all over again...But it don't make no difference, when life gets that much harder, it makes you that much stronger...some pages turned, some bridges burned but there were lessons learned.

Can I get an AMEN SISTA! When I look back on 2007, even the crappy times (excuse my language) I don't know that I would change any of it because I did learn things. I like looking back and seeing the valleys that God allowed me to go through so that I would be stronger, better, some how changed on the other side.

Now let's be honest here, I would love to tell you that I am thinner than I was in 2007 or that I in some way made some grand addition to society but the truth is, I'm still the same person. My only hope is that my friends and family, heck, even strangers were touched in some small way by something I did or said. At the end of the day, that's what matters to me. I want to know that I brought a smile to a face...somewhere, anywhere...maybe even to our Creator's face!

Well, gotta run...I'll post Christmas pictures soon. I'm just happy that for the first time in three years we were NOT, I repeat NOT at the hospital. God is AWESOME!

Peace Out!